Are You Trying To Kill Me?

There are times and situations in life that one will swear they will not survive and sometimes that is true. Thankfully, the majority of time it is not. I had one of those situations last night. I had a severe migraine. 8b91caa51e0ce916136fbbad9eaca2e3

To some that may seem like small potatoes and I guess it can be when you realize what others are facing but when you’re in the throws of a migraine that you are convinced is trying to kill you, it looks like Mount Everest. I am not currently taking any of kind of migraine medication because I am one of those medication phobia people. If I can treat it naturally or withstand the pain until it subsides I do but last night, I didn’t think that was going to happen. Going to the emergency room came to mind more than once but the two things that stopped me were 1. I knew they were just going to shoot me up with Dilaudid (an opiod pain reliever that affects the central nervous system and my CNS is already a mess) and 2. I know that using opiod and opiod like medications usually ends up in a rebound migraine. Sadly from experience.

Let me switch gears here for a moment if you don’t mind. Yesterday was Palm Sunday. The major Scripture reading for Palm Sunday is the narrative of our Lords Passion. I read this yesterday morning very slowly so I could let every word sink in before moving on and what stuck with me was our Lord in the garden of Gethsemane. The Lord knew what He was about to face. He prayed three times that evening and each time He asked our Father “If it be possible, remove this cup from me. but, thy will be done not my will”. This replayed over and over in my head all day yesterday. Even though the Lord asked for this cup of suffering to be removed he accepted it and was obedient to the Fathers will for Him knowing the pain he would have to suffer.

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Somewhere in the throws of my own pain last night I calmed myself long enough to pray and I repeated the words of our Lord in the garden to Our Father. “Father, please remove this pain from me but I know that Thy will must be done and not my own. If it I must undergo this pain please Father, bless my body and spirit with the strength to suffer and I offer this suffering to you for my husband and my family”

I took a lesson from our Lord. It did not make my pain any less. It did not make the sickness I felt any less and today, I am in bed because I have what is called the “classic migraine hangover”. While the pain has subsided for now I am still dealing with weakness, stomach upset and a general feeling of sickness while the pain in my  head teeters ever so near deciding if it will come back or not. What my prayer did do because The Father always hears us and answers us was to petition the Lord who did give me the strength to get through the suffering of last night. To be able to have the strength to suffer through what I honestly thought at one point was going to kill me. And because I didn’t let my suffering and pain go to waste and instead offered it to God, hopefully it will help those I offered it for. As with all things and this as well, Gods will be done. 

I truly believe if we choose Gods will over our own in all situations (not always easy) He will provide for us what we need, when we need it.

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