Social Media Pitfalls


There are many social media platforms but the most popular is Facebook. Four years ago I was still against joining the connected millions but as fate would have it I eventually caved to the request of friends and family and joined. Looking back I think it may have been a huge mistake. No, I know it was.. Now, sadly, I can count myself among the facebook surfing addicted. An addiction by the way I am trying to break.

I experienced the same “honeymoon phase” most did when they first got a friend request from someone they hadn’t spoken to in years. Then another came and another and another…It was mind blowing for the first year or so. All these people I grew up with that I haven’t seen in decades, kids I spent hours with in Summertime as a child. Relatives I haven’t connected with in years and on and on…and then…………as with any relationship real life sets in and things don’t look so rosy. And lately they look downright bleak. 

I find Facebook these days as depressing and dividing as the nightly news which I also stopped watching about two years ago. Each time you log in your bombarded with the days most upsetting, angering and sometimes gruesome news out there. And yes, you can adjust your newsfeed settings to see only certain things but when ‘friends’ are posting what you don’t want to see it’s no longer hidden. 

I’ve also found that as a society in the quest to be more connected, social media has made us even more disconnected. For many, the days of the Saturday drop in on a friend for coffee are gone. The spontaneous “lets call so and so and have them over for dinner and a game or something” are gone. The porch sitting at the end of the day with neighbors are gone. Why? Because we’re all so virtually connected that we are physically disconnected. 

For myself, this addiction has taken away from things I used to like to do. Simple things in life such as , all of the above, reading, watching a good movie, crafting etc. Why? Because I’m addicted to social media and always have my eyes on the laptop screen or my phone. I have vowed to break this addiction. In reflecting on my time on social media I have come to some conclusions. 

  • I don’t always need to be connected
  • Being connected all the time makes the mind unable to relax
  • I’ve wasted  a lot of time that could have been spent in better ways
  • I’ve become lazy in my physical connections
  • The majority of the people I haven’t spoken to in decades with the exception of a few hold no more importance in my life than before I knew “where they are now”
  • Sometimes, the kids you were inseparable with as a child and this includes family as well, grew up to be people you couldn’t stand to sit in a room with for ten minutes. 
  • The select few you have reconnected with surprised you because they turned out to be some of the nicest people you’ll ever know
  • Those who you truly connect with and not in just a superficial virtual way will stick with you through email and phone calls even if you leave facebook.

The good things I’ve learned from being on social media?

  • I’ve made a few old/new friendships that will last the rest of my life no matter where I am online or off
  • Just how important being physically connected to those I care for is.

Having learned all this I will be trying very hard to get to the point of deleting my facebook account all together. Until then I will be choosing to spend my time more wisely.. How about you?

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8 thoughts on “Social Media Pitfalls

  1. About once a week, I will open my Facebook, and check on certain friends, and family. I love seeing pictures of my friend’s children, and grandchildren. I do not watch any Cable News, only our local 5pm newscast. I have it set to record every evening, so I can fast forward any bull I see there. I do read over the newspaper every day. Cable News is simply sensationalism. Enjoyed reading you thoughts, Robin


    1. I think you’re doing it the right way MaryEllen.. I think I may try what you do with facebook.. I also only watch the local news and mostly just for the weather.. Thanks for coming by and commenting MaryEllen.. XO


  2. Robyn, it is a two edged sword to say the least I mean social media…there is good and bad. I am not on Facebook never have been guess cause I am old and never peaked my interest so that I feel is good for me because I really don’t think I would have the time. I work and I started watching youtube about 4 years ago to relax….then met a wonderful community and got hooked started doing videos…..but since last year when my Dad has been in a nursing home and we visit over 45 minutes away every week…..and I am down to one day weekends to get everything accomplished something had to go. I would love to film again and in time may, but for now my struggle is watching. I am trying really hard to limit myself simply because I have time for nothing else. I have gained some weight that I am trying to take off so less screen time equals more walk time. I am on Instagram I find that keeps me somewhat connected to the lovely friends I have met on youtube…..started snapchat but still learning a way to do small video at least. But I have given this a lot of thought as of late and my conclusion is it is hard to get away totally from all forms of social media and to a point maybe we don’t need to…..I think the age old question stills keeps coming up we all know it, we all think we can beat it but is still comes down to one thing that like weight is a struggle for me, and I suspect quite a few others that word…. you know it, you heard it but have you really thought about it ….BALANCE. I like you struggle daily with how much time I am allowing myself on the platforms. I don’t really watch TV or the news unless its a weather event. I try and limit my watching of youtube to no more than an hour or two which really is a lot. But I am trying…..I guess we all need to do what you just did keep reminding ourselves and others what we know to be true…..look up there is a whole world out there and they are just waiting for us to look up…. we might be pleasantly surprised that we found we had time for any social media to begin with. Thanks for the reminder I know I need it…..xoxo…..Debbie


  3. I don’t spend a ton of time on facebook . I don’t have a smart phone–so that may be part of the reason.. My facebook time varies–I belong to some support groups online that have greatly helped me with my disease–so sometimes I spend lengthly times getting info and help on that aspect.. I also keep updated with my daughter and her 4 children by her facebook updates. She used to blog, but no longer has that time–so she will post quick photos and such of what is happening and it really helps me. I hate the phone—never have liked talking on the phone, and with my daughter’s busy life this has been more practical. I do spend fun time each day in emails to my oldest grandchild—she is learning to type and we have several ongoing stories we both compose back and forth to each other. But facebook I enjoy greatly–it keeps me in touch and often informed and encourage–may be it depends on the feed.. But I do limit my friends and my feed often only follows a few. But each of us is different, and each of us have different interests, and addictions etc. So we all have to constantly check our lives and see what is helpful and not so helpful without judging what others do or don’t do. Each of us have different struggles and needs, for sure! Hope you find a balance for yourself .—we all need to check our lives for sure, thanks!


  4. I understand your love/hate relationship with Facebook all too well. At one point in my life I saw what everyone was posting and all I could see was that their side of life/yard was always greener than mine. It made me have envy and jealousy and I never had those feelings before. I hated those feelings I was having and I took a break. It made me realize how people post the good things or make things up to broadcast how well their life is to “show off.”
    I love Facebook because being in chronic pain, and I guess disabled I feel distant from everybody. I feel like my only access to people is Facebook. I have met great people, and can interact with them( including you) reconnected with great childhood friend and family, but have also unfriended childhood friends and family who I simply just don’t want that negativity.

    I try to keep my political stuff to myself as I know I won’t change anyone’s point of view. However politics have always been my passion and human rights, Animal rights etc. I am sure people get pissed about my posts but I hope they just scroll past and know that is just one side of me. I may not agree with what Sally posts….. But she is my friend and I think she has the right to say what she believes. I just scroll pass her post. Facebook is an addicting time waster…. I’m trying to have less screen time- but I am thankful for allowing me the access to the outside world when my world seems so small at times. Hope all is well my friend. Hugs to you, Lou and your babies. 💖🙏🏽


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